No, I have not been hit by a pear, and that's because I have never broken any rules! You're going to be fine, Deuce. It's only five minutes. Personally, I would take the wiggler over community service.
[ ohhhhh man, donuts... he's extremely tempted to take the bribe. but he wants to see what happens if you go into the wiggler!! maybe he can get both... ]
An honorable and decent queen would never accept a bribe, Deuce. You know this.
A compromise: Bring me a dozen assorted donuts and a carton of strawberry oat milk, and I will reduce your time in the wiggler in half. Two minutes and thirty seconds.
And your request has been denied. The pear wiggler is the pear wiggler, that's it's name and must be referred to as such.
[Oh god, for a moment he was worried the bribe had offended Riddle, but well, a compromise, yes this is fair, for only two and a half minutes of being used as a pear juicer.]
I can do that! There's a store on the way back! I can bring you two cartons even!
And very well. Why do we even have that thing though?
[Does he want to know? If he was Ace he would just call you out on your potential weird fetish Riddle. Fortunately for both of them, Deuce is not that kind of idiot. He's his own special kind of stupid.]
An extra carton will make it an even two minutes, to offset the extra time you took for your penance. It shows a willingness to right your misdoing. But that is all the time I'm willing to pare off your discipline!
[ haha get it pare, pear ]
As I said before, in an effort to reduce beheadings, I am coming up with alternative forms of disciplinary actions. The pear wiggler is one of those forms. Just as the Queen of Hearts held public executions to deter amoral behavior, I will hold public wigglings so everyone knows to follow the rules.
Don't worry, only Heartslabyul will be able to witness the wigglings. My hope is the events will also bring a sense of unity to the dorm.
That's the spirit, Deuce! Your manly spirit is something to be admired. Rather than seeing it as a punishment, look at it as an opportunity to show your fellow residents how strong someone who takes responsibility is.
I considered other fruits. Bananas are narrow at the top and bottom, so someone could get stabbed. I *did* consider oranges. Oranges don't leave bruises, you know.
And if it's any consolation, you won't be the only one in the wiggler. There are a few others who will be wiggling with you as well.
[ he was inspired by the most chaotic physics documentary known to man... now he can't stop saying wiggle. ]
[More likely that they will all laugh at him, especially when he inevitably pukes his guts out when it's over.]
An opportunity. That is a strange way to put it, but I suppose this will be a story to tell my children. Or something for everyone to mention at our ten year reunion.
I suppose oranges would be a bit more expensive. Probably smell better though.
And wouldn't a bunch of people in there lead to us breaking each others bones? It feels a like it would be too cramped.
[Wiggle sounds even worse in this context now. What kind of sadist are you?]
[ riddle never said it would be a glorious, refined, or dignified opportunity... ]
Cultivating an optimistic attitude is part of the learning process. I'll look into the matter of oranges and or other alternative fruits and consult Trey.
The wiggles and wobbles won't be as severe as you're imagining. Pear wigglers were originally created to predict the damage done to produce while they were in transit in the bed of a truck. It should essentially feel as if you're going down a bumpy road. The only difference is you will be sitting with your peers, surrounded by pears.
[ riddle? a sadist? perish the thought! he's a perfect little angel... ;) ]
Why would I need to try it when I haven't broken any of the rules? Punishing myself for no reason is senseless. Besides, if it's safe for fruits, one can assume it's safe for humans as well.
[ manipulation, desperation-- either way, riddle is stubborn, obscenely so. plus, there's no way he wants to get rattled and wobbled in that thing! for someone his size, it would be like shaking a hamster and a rock in a box!! ]
You're perfectly allowed to go out, you know. Simply follow the rules when you do, and you will remain un-wiggled. Is that so hard? If you are unsure of a rule, simply as the dorm group chat.
Trying to remember factual information is inefficient. The key to doing well in history is to understand the cause and effect of certain events. Professor Trein's exams will sometimes leave clues to specific dates if you find yourself needing them. However, simply having an abstract idea of when the event in question occurred is usually enough.
[ thanks for the unsolicited advice, riddle. also, unfortunately for him, 'a little annoying' is probably one of the nicer things thought about him lately, so he'll take it. ]
Anyway, if you're uncomfortable telling me you'll be out, you're free to tell Trey. But, also understand that as prefect and vice-prefect, if it's found out a student is unaccounted for, we would be reprimanded.
I don't. I have nowhere I'm interested in going, and cannot interrupt my studies. If I need something, if the school doesn't provide it, I simply have it delivered.
He does? I didn't think he was sneaky like that. It's usually all I can do to keep paying attention in his classes.
It's hard to focus in them sometimes.
But that's strangely helpful advice.
[Crewel was strangely enough much easier to deal with though. Maybe because the threat of violence is just something Deuce inherently appreciates.]
I can do that. I don't want either of you to get in trouble on my account. That would be the worst.
You really don't? I mean have you ever thought about just going outside of your comfort zone? No offense meant to you, but it might do you some good to leave the grounds once and a while.
[It doesn't compute. Granted, so many of Deuce's problems come from being unable to just sit still for long.
But never go out, really? At the very least wouldn't Riddle want to browse, like a book store, like all good nerds? Even Idia, the biggest shut in on campus would go out to do that.]
Academic test-taking is a full course in itself. There are certain ways questions are worded, and in some situations, you can even find the answer to entire questions you originally didn't know through process of elimination. If you're interested, I would be more than happy to teach you. A single point can mean the difference between a 74.4 and a 74.5. In your upper-division classes, this will be crucial, because a C- will not qualify you for credit and you may very well end up forced to retake the class.
[ he wonders if he's being meddlesome or annoying. that's another thing he often hears when the other students don't think he can hear them. riddle knows it's what he deserves, but it still hurts-- especially when his intention is and always has been to help the others.
even though he considers it, in the end riddle decides not to rescind his advice. he genuinely cares about deuce, and knows he couldn't stop fussing him even if he wanted to. ]
No offense taken.
I've considered it, but having a day out alone seems a bit...
[ lonely. awkward. sad. ]
Well, the only reason I would have to go out would be to run errands or shop, and since those can be done remotely, I never gave it much thought. I wasn't given leisurely time outside the house unless it was to attend a noble's function with my mother, so I wouldn't know where to even begin "going out".
I mean notes would be helpful. Though I'm not sure if I want to take yet another class, let alone one on test taking. But I know I need all the help I can get. If it just learned how to understand the questions and not get distracted, then maybe I'd pass.
And I don't know if I'd be able to take repeating a class. My mom would hate it for sure.
[It's fortunate that Deuce is receptive to such things, though that might be his own acceptance of his horrible academic skills. A part of him does balk at the thought of more things to study though. He's always been someone who preferred moving about.
And well, as bossy as Riddle is about the dorm's grades, Deuce should be listening to his Senapi. Like a proper student.]
I mean, sometimes you just go out alone even if it's to shop.
[He had all the time, unless he was accompanied but other delinquents and you couldn't actually consider those sorts of guys friends.]
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
timeasmymeasure
no subject
Date: 2021-05-05 03:15 am (UTC)[And you have Deuce?]
Is this because I wont' tell you what I was doing?
Do I have to give you my donuts? They're not Clover-Senpai's tarts, but I'd still let you have them all?
Also please stop using the word wriggle. I'm too hung over not to hear the wrong thing.
no subject
Date: 2021-05-06 01:20 am (UTC)[ ohhhhh man, donuts... he's extremely tempted to take the bribe. but he wants to see what happens if you go into the wiggler!! maybe he can get both... ]
An honorable and decent queen would never accept a bribe, Deuce. You know this.
A compromise: Bring me a dozen assorted donuts and a carton of strawberry oat milk, and I will reduce your time in the wiggler in half. Two minutes and thirty seconds.
And your request has been denied. The pear wiggler is the pear wiggler, that's it's name and must be referred to as such.
[ sorry your prefect is a gremlin, deuce ]
no subject
Date: 2021-05-06 01:43 pm (UTC)I can do that! There's a store on the way back! I can bring you two cartons even!
And very well. Why do we even have that thing though?
[Does he want to know? If he was Ace he would just call you out on your potential weird fetish Riddle. Fortunately for both of them, Deuce is not that kind of idiot. He's his own special kind of stupid.]
no subject
Date: 2021-05-06 08:47 pm (UTC)[ haha get it pare, pear ]
As I said before, in an effort to reduce beheadings, I am coming up with alternative forms of disciplinary actions. The pear wiggler is one of those forms. Just as the Queen of Hearts held public executions to deter amoral behavior, I will hold public wigglings so everyone knows to follow the rules.
Don't worry, only Heartslabyul will be able to witness the wigglings. My hope is the events will also bring a sense of unity to the dorm.
no subject
Date: 2021-05-08 02:31 am (UTC)As much as I dislike it, I accept and promise not to run. You have my word as a man!
I mean that is a good thing then, if you are trying to avoid beheadings. Though maybe we could wiggle with something softer? Like... bananas?
But I suppose it would be a bonding experience. Even if we all are punished, we can at least commiserate.
[Wiggle has stopped looking like a word at this point. Who even gave you this idea, Riddle?]
no subject
Date: 2021-05-08 10:13 am (UTC)I considered other fruits. Bananas are narrow at the top and bottom, so someone could get stabbed. I *did* consider oranges. Oranges don't leave bruises, you know.
And if it's any consolation, you won't be the only one in the wiggler. There are a few others who will be wiggling with you as well.
[ he was inspired by the most chaotic physics documentary known to man... now he can't stop saying wiggle. ]
no subject
Date: 2021-05-09 03:30 am (UTC)An opportunity. That is a strange way to put it, but I suppose this will be a story to tell my children. Or something for everyone to mention at our ten year reunion.
I suppose oranges would be a bit more expensive. Probably smell better though.
And wouldn't a bunch of people in there lead to us breaking each others bones? It feels a like it would be too cramped.
[Wiggle sounds even worse in this context now. What kind of sadist are you?]
no subject
Date: 2021-05-09 04:52 am (UTC)Cultivating an optimistic attitude is part of the learning process. I'll look into the matter of oranges and or other alternative fruits and consult Trey.
The wiggles and wobbles won't be as severe as you're imagining. Pear wigglers were originally created to predict the damage done to produce while they were in transit in the bed of a truck. It should essentially feel as if you're going down a bumpy road. The only difference is you will be sitting with your peers, surrounded by pears.
[ riddle? a sadist? perish the thought! he's a perfect little angel... ;) ]
no subject
Date: 2021-05-10 11:45 pm (UTC)To make sure. Since you are prefect and all.
[Is he trying to be manipulative? Or is this just desperation?]
I am never going to look at a pear the same way again. And I'm going to never go out again. Not if this is the result.
[I mean you do you Riddle. If he wasn't going to become a fruit cocktail, he'd be half amused at this bizarre show of perverted humanity.]
no subject
Date: 2021-06-02 09:09 am (UTC)[ manipulation, desperation-- either way, riddle is stubborn, obscenely so. plus, there's no way he wants to get rattled and wobbled in that thing! for someone his size, it would be like shaking a hamster and a rock in a box!! ]
You're perfectly allowed to go out, you know. Simply follow the rules when you do, and you will remain un-wiggled. Is that so hard? If you are unsure of a rule, simply as the dorm group chat.
no subject
Date: 2021-06-03 02:35 pm (UTC)And besides, sometimes it's awkward to ask when I have to explain why I'm asking.
[Really his mom was never this nosy. It's actually a little annoying.]
Don't you ever go out?
no subject
Date: 2021-06-07 10:24 am (UTC)[ thanks for the unsolicited advice, riddle. also, unfortunately for him, 'a little annoying' is probably one of the nicer things thought about him lately, so he'll take it. ]
Anyway, if you're uncomfortable telling me you'll be out, you're free to tell Trey. But, also understand that as prefect and vice-prefect, if it's found out a student is unaccounted for, we would be reprimanded.
I don't. I have nowhere I'm interested in going, and cannot interrupt my studies. If I need something, if the school doesn't provide it, I simply have it delivered.
no subject
Date: 2021-06-07 01:53 pm (UTC)It's hard to focus in them sometimes.
But that's strangely helpful advice.
[Crewel was strangely enough much easier to deal with though. Maybe because the threat of violence is just something Deuce inherently appreciates.]
I can do that. I don't want either of you to get in trouble on my account. That would be the worst.
You really don't? I mean have you ever thought about just going outside of your comfort zone? No offense meant to you, but it might do you some good to leave the grounds once and a while.
[It doesn't compute. Granted, so many of Deuce's problems come from being unable to just sit still for long.
But never go out, really? At the very least wouldn't Riddle want to browse, like a book store, like all good nerds? Even Idia, the biggest shut in on campus would go out to do that.]
no subject
Date: 2021-06-07 10:01 pm (UTC)[ he wonders if he's being meddlesome or annoying. that's another thing he often hears when the other students don't think he can hear them. riddle knows it's what he deserves, but it still hurts-- especially when his intention is and always has been to help the others.
even though he considers it, in the end riddle decides not to rescind his advice. he genuinely cares about deuce, and knows he couldn't stop fussing him even if he wanted to. ]
No offense taken.
I've considered it, but having a day out alone seems a bit...
[ lonely. awkward. sad. ]
Well, the only reason I would have to go out would be to run errands or shop, and since those can be done remotely, I never gave it much thought. I wasn't given leisurely time outside the house unless it was to attend a noble's function with my mother, so I wouldn't know where to even begin "going out".
no subject
Date: 2021-06-09 12:34 am (UTC)And I don't know if I'd be able to take repeating a class. My mom would hate it for sure.
[It's fortunate that Deuce is receptive to such things, though that might be his own acceptance of his horrible academic skills. A part of him does balk at the thought of more things to study though. He's always been someone who preferred moving about.
And well, as bossy as Riddle is about the dorm's grades, Deuce should be listening to his Senapi. Like a proper student.]
I mean, sometimes you just go out alone even if it's to shop.
[He had all the time, unless he was accompanied but other delinquents and you couldn't actually consider those sorts of guys friends.]
There's nothing you've ever wanted to do? At all?